I suppose that
I am one of the lucky ones. I have not
been the target of much bias, prejudice, or oppression. I have experienced my share of sexism,
accompanied by some ageism, but most of the bias, prejudice, and oppression I
have witnessed has been in regards to others.
Due to its
recent occurrence, I would like to share a situation of bias and oppression
that is fresh in my mind. I was
volunteering at my daughter’s school on Friday for a fundraising run/walk
event. The children were asked to run or
walk around the school grounds for one hour.
My daughter began the event with two of her good friends and I had the
pleasure of accompanying them. When she caught up to one of her friends from
the alternative learning classroom she asked her to join the group. Her two other friends offered up some
questionable glances. My daughter saw
the glances, grabbed the hand of her friend and they took off running. One of the first friends asked me, “Where
does H think she’s going?” I simply
stated, “It looks like she and E felt like running.” The girl stated, “That’s weird. E is so creepy.” I was completely caught off guard by this
comment, but reinforced that there was
nothing “creepy” about E, she just learns differently, and it looked to me that
they were having a great time. The two
girls just shrugged their shoulders, but had nothing more to add.
I was so proud
of my daughter in that moment. It was as
if she was protecting her friend from a potentially uncomfortable
situation. For the remainder of the walk
each twosome kept to themselves, yet one was undoubtedly happier than the
other. I am hoping that when the time is
right my daughter will be able to vocally address the complicated feelings
between them all, but until that time her actions will continue to speak louder
than her words.
I have witnessed
numerous situations of bias, prejudice, and oppression throughout the years,
but have been much more acutely aware of the presence over the last several
weeks. I have been affected personally by negativity based upon race, religion,
sexual orientation, age, and physical ability.
While every scenario is different, and I have acted differently each
time, they have all left a lasting impression.
As the weeks continue and I am asked to analyze these issues, each one
takes me to a place in my mind where I can make mental adjustments and alter my
persona to be a better advocate for those who may need my intervention.
Hi, Dana, it must be something to never have felt any biases and that is good. I enjoyed reading your blog and hearing a totally different viewpoint than what I have witnessed or been used to in my life. I know that sense your daughter did not allow her other friends to influence her decision about playing with the other girl that made you proud. Great blog.
ReplyDeleteDana,
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome experience and the way you handled it was superb! As adults jumping to conclusions and forming their own opinions we can really get things blown out of portion but it seems in this case everything was handled correctly. I know one of first blogs in this class was about my day care children playing at a park and the parent of the little girl came and got her and told her she couldn't play with my children and ended up leaving the park. I was definitely heated because it was a racist comment and her actions were even more racist. Hats off to you for handling your daughter's situation correctly.
Hi Dana,
ReplyDeleteWhat a blessing to read your blog and you never felt any biases that is a blessing. How old is your daughter? Just the other day my granddaughter who is 6 years old going on 20, she told me one little girl call her fat and picks on her. It make me so angry, because I don't like when kids picks on kids. Thank you for sharing your experience with your daughter it made me think how would can I handle the situation about my granddaughter. I applaud you thank you!
Royce,
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is almost 7 and in first grade. I also have a hard time with children picking on one another. Thankfully, she has a really good head on her shoulders. Unfortunately, one of her friends has a tendency to lash out at others and often talks negatively about other kids in their school. I do my best to try and diffuse the situations and make my point, but not put my daughter in an uncomfortable situation. It has been a big challenge for us both this year.
Dana,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing about your daughter. I am happy to hear that she handled things the way that she did. Children can be so cruel to other children that they think are not "just like them" unfortunately. As I was reading your comment, it reminded me of a situation that would happen during recess while I was student teaching in first and second grade. There would be a group of children that would try to not include another child for whatever reason. As a teacher we had to explain that they were supposed to include other children rather than exclude. I also would like to applaud you for how you handled things as well. Thank you for sharing about the experience. It is a good lesson for others.